It is rare for me to be in a state of love, joy, or peace without gratitude. I used to think of gratitude as this feeling or place of attainment—somewhere I must force myself to be to feel “good”. The directionless forcing on my end left me feeling defeated when I just couldn’t get myself into that state amidst the waves of other emotions.

What even is a state of pure gratitude? It isn’t just one emotion.

In her book Atlas of the Heart: Mapping Meaningful Connection and the Language of Human Experience, Brené Brown says, “Gratitude is an emotion that reflects our deep appreciation for what we value, what brings meaning to our lives, and what makes us feel connected to ourselves and others.”

I see it as an interconnected state of love, joy, and peace—possibly even fulfillment on some level. Gratitude is like a mother to all the emotions that we like to experience in our lives. It is embedded within each of them; it comes alive within each of them. I would go a step further and argue that it is the soul of all the emotions we enjoy experiencing. It nurtures, strengthens, and embodies these emotions, which is why when we are in a state of lack or fear, the gratitude dissipates.

I don’t believe it’s possible to feel fearful and grateful simultaneously. I believe fear and love drive our emotional states and lives.

Gratitude is the anchor within love that centers our soul and grounds our spirit. It gives us presence where fear tries to hide it. It showers us with perspective when despair takes its aim. Together with an array of love, joy, peace, fulfillment, hope, wonder, awe, and truth—to name a few—gratitude gives us the ultimate gift of the human experience. It gives us unconditional love.

How to Ignite Gratitude

Gratitude often begins not in the grand, but in the gentle—through awareness, pause, and presence. When our mind is racing or we are at dis-ease, we can return to it with intention. These are some of the ways I like to cultivate gratitude in my everyday life.

• Begin and end your day with noticing. Before your feet touch the floor in the morning, name one thing you already have that you once wished for. Before bed, think of one moment that made you feel joy, grace or simply alive. It can be an expression of gratitude for your working body, an ordinary moment from your day, a special memory or something beautiful that happened in your day.
• Write what you feel, not just what you have. Instead of listing blessings, explore why something or someone moves you—let gratitude deepen into meaning.
• Step outside. The natural world grounds us in perspective; the wind, sunlight, and even silence remind us of life’s vastness and continuity. Take your shoes off, close your eyes and appreciate where you are in this present moment.
• Express it aloud. Tell someone why you appreciate them. Gratitude grows when shared—it multiplies in the exchange.
• Turn challenge into reflection. When life tests you, ask, What might this be teaching me? How can I use this for good? Often, gratitude is hidden in hindsight. We can be grateful for life’s challenging experiences and adversities. This isn’t about deferring how you might be feeling, quite the opposite. It’s about searching for that rainbow in the storm, and sometimes you might not see it right away.
• Breathe it in. A slow, conscious breath can be the simplest act of thanks—a quiet acknowledgment that you are here, still standing and still becoming.

Gratitude doesn’t demand perfection; it invites presence. It’s not a destination, but a returning—a remembering of what has always been enough.

I believe gratitude begins with the simple truth of being here at all—something I reflect on in Alive: the greatest gift we’ll ever receive. And when the world feels dim, it’s gratitude that lets us be the lighthouse, choosing light over darkness.